People are afraid to pursue their most important dreams, because they feel that they don’t deserve them, or that they’ll be unable to achieve them. We, their hearts, become fearful just thinking of loved ones who go away forever, or of moments that could have been good but weren’t, or of treasures that might have been found but were forever hidden in the sands. Because, when these things happen, we suffer terribly.

There are many reasons why we don’t go after our dreams. The main reason, I believe, is that our dreams have faded away along the years. We dream as kids to be firemen, doctors, pilots or astronauts. Because at that point of our lives, everything is clear and everything is possible. Kids are never afraid to dream. But, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince them that it will be impossible for them to realize their Personal Legend.

We grow to believe that we are unable to achieve our dreams; and we become fearful. Why don’t people’s hearts tell them to continue to follow their dreams? Because that’s what makes a heart suffer most, and hearts don’t like to suffer. Fear is the main obstacle to almost everything in life. The fear of suffering, fear of disappointment and naturally we’re afraid that, in pursuing our dream, we might lose everything we’ve won.

The Alchemist is a book about listening to your heart and following your dreams. It tales the story of a shepherd in search of his dream and treasure. It describes his journey and the lessons he learns along the way. And by following his heart, he is able to overcome his fear and gain the most important treasures in life. Follow his magnificent journey and may it be inspiration for you to follow your heart and dreams. Because when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.

*in italics are quotes borrowed from the book, either directly or paraphrased.

No Perl, no technology, no pseudo-philosophy/pseudo-intellectual stuff and boring stuff I write about. Let me write about something fun. I’m flying back to Hong Kong tonight. I will get to see my girlfriend whom I haven’t seen since August 23rd.

And no one is more fun than her, so let’s write about her (and she never reads my blog, so I can be blunt ). She is really the light of my life; I’m the dull and boring guy, and she is the exciting one. If it weren’t for her, I couldn’t even finish this post since I’m no fun at all. And I think the phrase “better half” couldn’t be more suiting.

You know how when people grow older, they get more defensive, become less inquisitive, and lose that enthusiasm and purity that kids innately have? I know I am generalising but I believe it is a common phenomenon. Well she is still that naive, happy and uncorrupted child. It makes me smile just thinking about her. I wrote her a poem along the lines of being a “Rose in this concrete world”. Although she mentioned that she likes lavender

She has the most beautiful smile in the world; people just look at her and like her instantly. She is extremely good around people, and carries this aura of happiness. Am I exaggerating because she is my partner? Actually I think I am doing the opposite of exaggeration, since I don’t think I can capture her beauty with my writing.

Where ever she goes, she is THE child magnet. Kids love her, which is why I always encourage her to open a childcare. Her friends love her. But most importantly I love her. How did she end up with an over analysing, logical, soft spoken computer guy? Well that’s how relationships work; one half makes up what’s missing in the other half. And with that I end with this (I just couldn’t resist quoting ):

“I have lost count of the number of couples I have known in whom one partner’s apparent vices exactly correspond to the other’s virtues: bumptiousness to charm, noisiness to quietness, talking to listening, selfishness to grace, nastiness to kindness, meanness to generosity, closed to open, nasty to nice. I suppose people often look for a partner who can voice the parts of themselves they have difficulty in expressing.” – John Lanchester in Fragrant Harbour page 64.

I watched Apocalypto yesterday and although I don’t like using the word epic (since it is overused by young people), that would be the word to describe the film. The make up, the sceneries and the actors looked amazing. Although academics and historians have blasted the movie for its inaccurate portrayals of Mayan Civilisation and other things such as historical dates, I have learned to watch movies (especially Hollywood films) as a fictional piece of art but I do understand that some people will believe in everything that they see. Nevertheless I absolutely enjoyed watching the film and in particular there was one scene that I really enjoyed, and would like to share.

I have sat and pondered over the meaning and message of this simple story. It’s a simple message, we are sad when we don’t have what we want. And when we get what we want, we want more. It’s true to the core. I remember as a kid, I had a video game console but with no games. The game I wanted more than anything else in this world was Street Fighter 2. But it was sold for a ridiculous price, since I was in PNG and these things are very rare and valuable. I told my parents and myself that I would only need to have one game and I would be content if I got Street Fighter 2. After gaining possession of the game, I remember soon after I got bored of the game and actually wanted more games even when I assured my parents and myself that I would only want one game! Almost 2 decades later, I find myself in the same situation where I have this superficial want. It’s ok to want more, but sometimes we need to distinguish between a want and a need.

The beauty of the story is that you can relate the story to many different scenarios. You can relate it to how we all keep taking from nature and this world; how we keep asking for more and are never content; and generally how we are just damn insatiable because we all have holes. I love the Buddhist philosophy; they believe that desire and ignorance lie at the root of suffering. We all need to develop that mentality; we need to know what we want, and want what we have.

I don’t remember how the conversation about Bougainville started, but there I was talking to a colleague about its natural beauty and how uncorrupted the place was due to it separateness from the rest of the world. Bougainville is where I grew up and the place my family moved to when I was only 1 year old. I have very fond memories of the place and I can’t remember anything bad from the place. Even when the war started and we had to evacuate I didn’t feel scared. Perhaps that was due to my naivety as a kid, but I definitely think it was also associated with the environment in which I grew up. Like I said, all memories were pretty much positive.

I always enjoy talking about Bougainville (despite the negative connotations of the name in Australia [for the uninitiated look up Bogan in Aussie slang]), because my memories of the place were so perfect. I can always remember how sincere the locals were every morning when greeting us. Our workers were always happy and everyone just smiled. The beach was just down the road and we could always enjoy a majestic sunset, although at 4 years old I would hardly appreciate such beauties. On occassions we would visit Loloho, which to me will always be the most beautiful beach in the world. The water was crystal clear and you could swim with an abundance of sea creatures, although my dad would argue that that was a good thing since he stepped on a sea urchin and needed to go to the hospital. It was a simple life that I loved.

I never did understand why we had to leave; all I knew was that the BRA started this war. And as a kid I would just do as I was told. I still remember gunshots at night and the helicopters, although I don’t remember being scared or worried. It was only until recently when I talked to a friend who asked me about the documentary, Coconut revolution. I had never heard of the documentary and after some googling, I became very interested in watching it seeing how little I knew about Bougainville and the BRA war. I managed to find a copy and it was an eye opener. I understood the cause of the war and came to respect it. Deep down I think I was angry at the war because it made me leave my home, most of all my belongings and my dog. But after seeing and hearing about some of the unjust that was happening, I am happy something was done. Although war is never the perfect solution, I can see why it broke out. Years of betrayal and corporate irresponsibility from the large mining companies would brew the anger that would drive a war.

I do wish that I day I can visit Kieta and Arawa again. It would bring back so many fond memories. To this day, it is still the only paradise I know of.